


Blacken my eye, set fire to my tie

by WaltherP420



Category: Lupin III
Genre: Blood and Injury, Caretaking, Denial of Feelings, Drunken Flirting, Hurt/Comfort, Injury Recovery, M/M, No Sex, Teasing, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:48:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27027601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaltherP420/pseuds/WaltherP420
Summary: How much did the people around him, even people as open and hedonistic as Lupin's gang, go around leaving unsaid? How often had he assumed disdain or malice or disinterest when he could have found love? If Zenigata had known it was all it would take to find all this out, he might have gotten himself stabbed a lot sooner. Seconds later he registered that that was a disconcerting and masochistic way to feel, but he felt it nonetheless.
Relationships: Arsène Lupin III/Zenigata Kouichi, Jigen Daisuke/Arsène Lupin III, Jigen Daisuke/Zenigata Kouichi
Comments: 13
Kudos: 48





	Blacken my eye, set fire to my tie

**Author's Note:**

> "[Koichi Zenigata is] a man with no friends, family, or partner, whose entire world revolves around his job. He will melt at any sign of respect or show of flirtation."

Zenigata tried to pull himself together but could only muster a dim state of not-quite-awareness. His senses were refusing to come back to him all at once and were instead giving him moments of lucidity in short and limited increments. He was in a jerking moving car and it was hot and cramped and he hurt, his entire body hurt, dull in some places and unbearably sharp in others. The smell was gunpowder and cigarette smoke and blood and sweat and he could feel hands pressed on his body to steady him and to try to stop his bleeding. After a moment he realized there was a chorus of familiar voices yelling around him along with the sound of the road, accompanied by occasional gunshots. His eyes were screwed shut and he wanted to open them but felt so sick and tired and so heavy and already overstimulated for how much pain he was in. So instead he let himself pass back out.

When he woke up again he was laid out on a bed barely large enough for his tall, broad body. Without opening his eyes he could tell the room was small and quiet and still. It smelled like fresh linen and booze. He tried to remember where he was or what had happened but it was like trying to remember a sequence of events when you'd just been blackout drunk. Nothing but vague disconnected sense memories. The effort was tiring and he wanted to sink back into sleep but then he could feel someone else in the room with him, watching him, and even hurt and completely exhausted that was alarming enough to send a surge of adrenaline through his body. He snapped his eyes open and turned to see who it was.

It was Lupin. Less than three feet away and sitting on what looked like a wooden chair grabbed from a kitchen table. He was leaning forward in the chair and Zenigata had just caught him staring at him while he had been passed out.

They both froze.

Zenigata refused to be the first one to look away which became more difficult as Lupin's shocked expression melted into a warm smile. Zenigata felt his face turn red. As they looked at each other he realized Lupin was also injured, with a black eye and assorted bruises and cuts visible on his face, neck, and arms. He was wearing a black button up shirt and black pants and had a glass of whiskey held loosely in his left hand. 

As they both kept staring, Lupin's big smile reached his eyes and he slow blinked, almost like a cat- trying to communicate _you're safe here, I mean you no harm_ \- and while Zenigata didn't buy it he still used it as an opportunity to look away. He looked down at his own body and saw he was covered in bandages which made sense considering he was stiff all over and still in pain, especially his left side.

"Glad to see you pulled through, Pops!" said Lupin cheerfully. He leaned to set the whiskey glass on the carpet by his chair. His body's movements had a sway to them. Zenigata didn't need a detective's intuition to discern Lupin had been drinking for a while.

Zenigata looked back up at him, confused about what he'd said.

"Oh! You don't remember? Jeez. Uh…" Lupin paused. He was usually a smooth chatterbox and was looking uncharacteristically awkward, searching for words. He looked down for a moment then out the window by the bed.

"You got the jump on me while Jigen and I were finishing up a casino heist and then security got the jump on us and, uh, you got stabbed protecting me." Lupin looked back at Zenigata with a bashful smile and pointed down at Zenigata's aching side to indicate where he'd been stabbed. "They were trying to take us to a second location where they could put a bullet in our brains without disturbing casino patrons and they probably would have let you go but like always you were too stubborn for your own good. When I slipped away from one of them and another noticed and charged me with a knife, you stepped in and took the hit."

Also similar to the day after a bender, Zenigata was having an easier time remembering the previous night's events as Lupin explained what had happened and provided a clean, linear narrative to help fill in the gaps in his memory. Lupin looked bashful but calm now and looking over his face Zenigata could remember Lupin's panicked and enraged scream when he got stabbed and that Lupin was the one holding him in the back of the little fiat, bloody fingers splayed just under his ribcage. He remembered Lupin begging him not to die. He also remembered clocking Lupin right in the face during the confrontation outside the casino before security showed up. That black eye was definitely his fault. Maybe some of the other bruises, too. Oops.

"We actually did try to take you by a hospital but there were casino goons waiting there and we didn't want to risk it. So we brought you back here."

Zenigata relaxed a little and let his head drop back on the pillow. He stared up at the ceiling. He wanted to thank Lupin for patching him up and saving his life but wasn't sure if he could do it. He felt his eyes misting up. He really didn't want to cry in front of Lupin right now.

"Thank you, Pops," said Lupin quietly, soft words cutting through Zenigata's inner turmoil. "I let my guard down and if he'd gotten to me he probably would have killed me. I can't just judo throw guys who are stabbing me away like you can!"

Zenigata expected some kind of joke or teasing comment to follow the expression of sincere gratitude but none came. Uh oh. At this rate he'd _definitely_ cry.

"'s fine," said Zenigata, voice quiet, still looking at the ceiling. "You saved me too so now we're even. Don't worry about it."

Lupin sighed and stood up, standing over Zenigata and looking down, forcing his monkey face into Zenigata's field of vision. At that distance Zenigata could smell the alcohol on his breath even stronger.

"I don't think us keeping you from bleeding out on the pavement means that we're 'even', Pops."

"Even enough," muttered Zenigata. "I don't want a gang of criminals owing me any kind of debt."

"Too bad!" said Lupin. When Zenigata kept frowning up at him Lupin sighed again.

"You're so stubborn!" he said.

"Look who's talking!" scoffed Zenigata back up at him.

Lupin leaned in a little more and reached out a hairy-knuckled hand to touch the bed by Zenigata's arm with his fingertips. Zenigata suppressed the urge to flinch away out of worry it was a trap or some kind of cruel fake come-on or joke. He managed to keep still but could feel himself starting to sweat.

"I'm serious!" whined Lupin. "Let me be serious for a second!"

Lupin was a man who was almost impossible to take at face value but Zenigata decided to keep his mouth shut and let him speak.

"I know you're the kind of man who would rather die than accept help from someone like me and I know you're not looking for any gratitude either. But you risked your life to save me and I'm not going to let you pretend that that doesn't mean something to me! Come on! Regardless of how much of a pain in the ass you are I don't want you dying on account of me! I couldn't live with myself."

Zenigata made a face that seemed to indicate he felt like Lupin would carry on just fine without him and to his surprise Lupin looked genuinely hurt by even the suggestion. Whether it was to make a point or by some kind of uncontrollable emotional urge, Zenigata wasn't sure, but Lupin swooped down and hugged him tightly. He was careful not to agitate Zenigata's injuries but the shock and meaning of the gesture, the _embrace,_ were still both a lot to handle and it just shattered whatever front Zenigata had been trying to put up. Even if Lupin had left him to bleed out or had dumped him at that hospital Zenigata wouldn't have hated him and he would have taken the knife a thousand times over either way. Having it drilled into his head that his rival appreciated it and cared about him too, that he didn't mind taking care of him, was a lot.

So of course he started crying.

With such a small expression of intimacy and empathy Lupin had broken the levee and within moments Zenigata was just bawling.

Lupin felt Zenigata's big chest start to heave as he cried and moved off of him, sitting on the edge of bed next to him instead. Zenigata brought one hand up to cover his eyes out of embarrassment as he tried to pull himself together, sobbing and sniffing and coughing and as always a big man whose frame still wasn't big enough to contain all of his emotions, and when Lupin put a hand on his shoulder and gently rubbed it in a comforting gesture it undid Zenigata all over again. 

Zenigata moved his big hand off of his face and used it to grip the thin wrist of the hand Lupin had on his shoulder. This time he was looking right into Lupin's eyes, ruddy face and tears and snot be damned. After a few moments Zenigata found his voice, though he found it as just another outlet for his overflowing emotional state. 

"I was scared," he said, "I was so fucking scared when they all had guns pointed at us and I saw him come at your back with the knife, I didn't know if I could stop him in time, and I was so relieved when I did. Fuck, Lupin, you need to choose less scary targets. That was awful, I don't know if I can… Damnit, Lupin…" he paused then tightened his grip. "I'm so glad you're alive!"

It was Lupin's turn to feel overwhelmed and he paused for a moment trying to figure out what to say.

"You should worry about yourself more, Pops," said Lupin finally, his voice shaking a little. He reached his free hand down and brushed some of the tears off of Zenigata's face with his thumb before resting his hand in the other man's hair, gently carding his long, thin fingers through it, calloused fingertips lightly rubbing his scalp or playing at one of his sideburns or at his five o'clock shadow.

Well. This was different.

Zenigata stopped crying more out of surprise than anything else. His eyes went wide and Lupin could feel the firm grip on his wrist grow clammy.

"I'm not the one who got gutted like a fish, Pops. You know you ruined your trench coat spurting blood everywhere, not to mention my poor fiat's upholstery." Lupin squeezed his shoulder again and kept running his fingers through Zenigata's hair or along the side of his face as he spoke. He was teasing but his voice was so soft, his tone laced with an implication Zenigata wasn't sure he'd ever heard come out of Lupin before. If he'd heard it before he certainly had never heard it directed at himself.

"We'll have to send INTERPOL the cleaning bill, huh, Pops?"

Was this some kind of trick? A trap? Zenigata tried to listen to his gut but his gut was covered in bandages and full of butterflies. He felt light-headed. Lupin was looking down at him with both an expression of genuine love and a borderline frightening hunger in his eyes.

The door to the little room already stood open several inches so Jigen only gave a light, half-hearted knock when he came in.

"Hey, how's… oh, come the fuck on, Lupin!" Lupin didn't turn to face Jigen or take his hands off Zenigata. Nothing to acknowledge the exasperation in Jigen's voice. "We talked about this! You're not even going to let Pops heal up before you pull this shit?"

Lupin didn't blink or break eye contact with Zenigata when he shouted back, "Carpe diem, Jigen! _Carpe inspectorem!_ What's wrong with a little gratitude, huh? _"_

"Fuck, man! Look at his face! What are you doing to him? His eyes are so wide he looks like somebody just goosed an owl!"

Jigen and Lupin were having this argument directly in front of Zenigata, with Jigen gesturing emphatically to his injuries and his petrified face, still framed on one side by the loving grip of Lupin's hand.

"You should change his bandages and give him some painkillers and let him sleep. The last thing Pops needs is-"

_"Oh! Mon beau inspecteur! Mon énorme inspecteur!"_

"Ah, fuck, man, you're _drunk?_ What are you doing? You are fucking _shameless,_ Lupin!"

 _"Démon!"_ wailed Lupin in response, finally snapping his head to glare at Jigen, venom in his voice _. "Poule mouillée! Cockbloquer!"_

"Lupin, there are ways to thank a man and let him know you care about him that aren't getting loaded, babbling a bunch of French, and trying to get his cock in your m-"

At that Zenigata sat up ramrod straight, no longer able to handle being prone under Lupin if this was the conversation that was going to be happening above him, and the action did get Lupin to step back but also sent a jolt of pain down Zenigata's side.

Jigen grabbed Lupin by his collar, said "Go have a glass of water and a cold shower! Fuckin' seriously, man!", and shoved him towards the door. Lupin slipped under his grip easily and turned back towards Zenigata but upon seeing how Zenigata was breathing heavier, doubled over a little, spent and clearly in pain, Lupin lost his fight and let Jigen drag him out the door.

Jigen came back a few minutes later with a little tray of bandages, a glass of water, a wet washcloth, and medication. In the interim Zenigata did not hear Lupin take a cold shower and instead heard him begging Fujiko for attention and company through her bedroom door, his pleas a mix of French, Japanese, and English, and what phrases Zenigata could understand were vulgar nonsense. Typical.

Jigen pulled the same chair Lupin had been using closer to the bed and set his tray on the nightstand.

Zenigata would normally feel a little overwhelmed at the tenderness and intimacy of anyone taking care of him like this, let alone his rival's partner, let alone following whatever had just happened with Lupin. A gunman with a crossed off kill list a mile long, a man Zenigata did, in spite of himself, openly admire. A man he'd also like to share a drink with in some other life or time. Or, well, now maybe _this_ life if he was going to be recovering in whatever safehouse this little room was in. Sharing a drink with a man certainly had less loaded meaning than him smiling at you, gesturing for you to lift your arms up, and carefully and meticulously peeling bandages off of your midsection, gently tugging skin away from bandage rather than the other way around as he got closer to wounds to avoid straining your injuries, checking carefully as he went to assess damages and making sure he didn't make anything worse.

Zenigata wondered absently how often Lupin and Jigen did this for each other, picturing them using deft hands to sew each other up and tending to each other as they recovered.

He couldn't help but feel a little jealous.

Zenigata's hands were clumsier than theirs to begin with, and when injured and shaking from adrenaline and trying to reach some weird place on his back or his shoulder or his leg they were even worse, and he always either had to drag himself to a potentially hostile hospital or roll the dice and do his best and inevitably deal with ugly, uneven scars from his own efforts at taking care of himself, ugly because they all served as reminders of his lonely, failed attempts to capture Lupin, how he was shredding his poor body in pursuit.

Speaking of, Jigen pulled back the bandages from his stab wound and Zenigata got a good look at it for the first time. Talk about _ugly-_ the stitches were neat and even and there was no sign of infection but it was a brutal injury. The knife had been stabbed in and then ripped down, some kind of serration to it, much deeper at point of entry but still leaving a jagged line a few inches down Zenigata's side. Or maybe Zenigata had done some of that to himself when he threw his assailant off of him the way Lupin had described. Jigen reached for the cloth to clean the dried blood off of Zenigata's stitches but then paused and looked up at him.

"Stealing and fucking are the two things Lupin considers himself best at and they also happen to be the only two ways he's capable of communicating affection," he said matter-of-factly, ripping off the bandaid of the conversation. He didn't wait for Zenigata to reply. "That's how he operates. You already know he's like that with women but he's like that with the men he loves too. Trust me. Not that you'd hear me complaining but I get the feeling it isn't how _you_ operate."

Wait. "Loves"?

Jigen peeked at Zenigata under the brim of his hat, picking up the cloth and smiling mischievously. "You and Lupin are both obsessive and driven as hell but you seem a little more, uh, _monogamous_?"

At this point it was absurd to try to hide his feelings, of course it was, but still clinging to his pride Zenigata gave Jigen an incredulous look. It was a weak look but at least it was an attempt.

"I'm just saying that you seem practiced in a different form of one-track devotion, Pops. It would almost be admirable if it wasn't such a pain in the ass for us."

He very gently placed one hand above the wound to steady himself and started cleaning it with the other. Zenigata tried not to focus on the warm, gentle weight of Jigen's palm on his ribcage.

"Lupin really likes the attention, though. He really likes _you_ and has for a long time. I'm surprised it took you almost dying for him to express that, and to express it drunk when you're too fucked up from saving him to reciprocate anyway. I think he was nervous he'd fuck it up and put you off or that you'd think he was teasing you, or even that you _wouldn't_ reciprocate."

Jigen finished cleaning and reached for the fresh bandages.

"Which we all told him was stupid. You're a great man, Zenigata, but you've never been able to hide your feelings for _shit_."

It hurt a little to turn his head but Zenigata still turned and stared slack-jawed at Jigen. Lupin felt love for him? Lupin was _attracted_ to him? Daisuke Jigen thought he was a " _great man_ "?

How much did the people around him, even people as open and hedonistic as Lupin's gang, go around leaving unsaid? How often had he assumed disdain or malice or disinterest when he could have found love? If Zenigata had known it was all it would take to find all this out, he might have gotten himself stabbed a lot sooner. Seconds later he registered that that was a disconcerting and masochistic way to feel, but he felt it nonetheless.

Jigen finished up with the bandages and explained the pill dosage to Zenigata. He then let him know that one of them would see him in the morning with a fresh glass of water and some breakfast if he was up for it. Jigen picked up the tray and dirty bandages and turned to leave. He noticed the whiskey glass on the floor, picked it up, downed it, and put the glass on his tray before turning back towards Zenigata.

"Let me know if you need anything, okay, Pops? And I'd say lock the door to keep him out but we both know that wouldn't do much."

"It's, uh. It's fine. Maybe if I play dead he'll get bored, huh?"

Jigen laughed, openly and genuinely, all the way to his eyes, almost dropping the glass off of the tray, then looked back down at Zenigata again.

"And, Pops, thank you. We all appreciate it. You took a knife in the gut and saved my best friend's life. I never realized our gang of villains had a big burly guardian angel! It's not much of a stretch to understand what he sees in you, you know!"

"Now _you_ sound drunk, Jigen."

Jigen laughed again and then went out the door, closing it softly behind him.

Zenigata was exhausted and especially after taking some pain medication couldn't have stayed awake if he'd wanted to.

He woke up the next morning and smelled coffee and again felt someone in the room with him. He rubbed his eyes and turned to look and there Lupin sat in the same chair, dark blue shirt instead of black, mug in his hand instead of a glass, reading a book in his other hand rather than drunkenly leering at Zenigata. Or at least he had been fast enough to pick up the book and pretend to be reading it when he noticed Zenigata was awake.

"Mornin'," said Zenigata hoarsely, covers still pulled up over his shoulder.

Lupin snapped the book shut and beamed at him. "Morning! How you feeling, Pops?"

"Like shit," said Zenigata, though he smiled as he said it.

"I, wanted to uh," said Lupin, setting his coffee on the nightstand. "Talk to you about-"

"It's fine, Lupin," said Zenigata, cutting in and trying to avoid the awkward conversation he knew was coming.

"I just-"

"Come on. It's fine."

"No, Pops, I was supposed to watch you and take care of you all night and I woke up an hour ago with a hangover and remembered what I did instead. I'd gotten so worried and in my own head about what happened that when you were out I drank half a bottle of Jack Daniel's and then tried to fuck you the second you woke up. I know myself. Jigen was right and if he hadn't come in-"

"Would that have, I mean- Would that really have been a problem?" interrupted Zenigata.

Lupin looked stunned for a moment, staring straight ahead, almost like he'd just been slapped. Then a realization dawned on him and when Lupin looked back over to him Zenigata saw a shadow of that same hungry look on the other man's face. It gave him a chill. Maybe he shouldn't have interrupted. Maybe he was glad he had.

Lupin stood up.

"Jeez, Pops. Jigen told me you took it well but I didn't think you took it _that_ well."

Lupin closed the gap between them and started gently but firmly pushing Zenigata to lay on his back rather than his side. Zenigata let him.

"I was all set to be the absolute portrait of repentance and set to ask you if you wanted Jigen in here again to change your bandages instead of me. In case I'd made you uncomfortable."

Lithe and graceful and without much weight put on the other man's body at all, Lupin hopped up and straddled Zenigata's thighs over the covers. He leaned down to plant his hands on either side of Zenigata's neck, between his shoulders and the pillow. If Lupin was using such a gentle touch and was being so careful to not strain or put weight on his injuries, why did Zenigata feel like a steel trap had just been sprung on him? Like he'd fallen into it, unsuspecting? Why did he feel so cornered and pinned down while barely being touched? And by a man he had a few inches in height and a couple dozen pounds on?

And why did that idea, along with the look on Lupin's face- that dark smile, playful but borderline ravenous, the look he'd only ever seen years before when Lupin was younger and more erratic and violent- _why did they both excite Zenigata so much?_

"And then I had this whole setup in my head where I'd seduce you while you healed up by building up your trust again, just a look here or an _accidental_ touch of our hands there. I didn't realize it was fine if I just had my way with you on day one! I never imagined you'd be so _easy,_ Inspector!"

Even caught up in the moment, Zenigata rolled his eyes. Lupin laughed and leaned down and kissed him. Zenigata welcomed it. Lupin gripped the bedsheets tighter with one hand and brought the other up to hold the side of Zenigata's face again. Lupin kept his aggression in check considering the situation but Zenigata could still feel his hunger. He could feel _something else_ starting to poke his leg through the sheets as well. He wished he could reach up and around Lupin with both arms, press their bodies close, to fully embrace him, but he knew it was a bad idea.

Lupin nipped Zenigata's bottom lip as he pulled out of the kiss, sending a little jolt of excitement and pain up Zenigata's spine, before sitting back up. Zenigata let out a quiet groan at the loss of contact.

"I _was_ being a fucking idiot last night, though, and I'm sorry for that. You're hurt and I don't want to make it worse right now. So," he said, somehow flipping his body off of Zenigata and landing feet-first on the carpet in one smooth motion, instantly upright and looking down at his rival again, "I'm gonna go jerk off in the shower and then take a nap to sleep off my hangover. Jigen and I are going to take turns with your bandages over the next few days or weeks or however long it takes for you to heal up. I know it'll be a while before we can really do anything but I think I can figure out a way for us to have some fun whenever it's my turn to help out."

Zenigata balked at him.

"Or for me to have fun at your expense, anyway."

"Fuck off, Lupin!"

"Oh, that's the idea! See you later! Rest up, Pops!" Lupin popped out the door and slammed it behind him before calling, "And don't worry, I'll be thinking about you and those eyelashes and that big dick the whole time!" back through it. Seconds later Zenigata heard the shower start.

Zenigata put his hands over his face and let out a long groan. Day one here and Lupin was already exhausting. And on top of that he had Zenigata wrapped around his finger. 

What else was new, though? Maybe Zenigata really _was_ a masochist. How else could he love someone like Lupin from a distance for so many years, never allowing himself to honestly or directly express how he was feeling? What had he been so afraid of? Much more afraid of than he ever had been of dying?

He reached over and grabbed another couple of painkillers. The introspection and psychoanalysis could wait. He needed to rest up and get better or Lupin really _would_ kill him.

**Author's Note:**

> The title is from the song "The Masochism Tango" and the first note is from Zenigata's TV tropes page.
> 
> I thought about a lot of different things while writing this! I mostly want to try to focus on writing shorter one-shots while getting back into writing fanfiction and with this one to write hurt/comfort that was sweet and not explicit but retained the lasciviousness of Lupin's character. I enjoy reading all sorts of Lupin III fanfiction (I'm sure some of it played into how I approached this, I definitely had honeyteeth's recent work "unsaid" in my head at the beginning!) and don't mean this as an insult at all but I do think sometimes Zenigata is written as dominant and Lupin as slight and submissive and I don't see their characters that way at all. So it's fun to play around with a different dynamic. I also don't consider Lupin to be the best person when it comes to sex and friendships and relationships and don't endorse everything he does in this fic or intend to have it represent a healthy relationship dynamic whatsoever.
> 
> A while back I saw a lovely fanart which you can see here https://twitter.com/amazukidesu/status/1312589860968960000?s=19 which may have partially inspired Jigen's "guardian angel" line. Some other ideas were inspired by a different manga I'm a fan of but those were more similar emotional beats than anything else.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
